It's been a whirlwind fall and I cannot believe we are already less than a month from Christmas. But I guess its really no surprise time has been flying....the Brooks/Kopulos household has been a flurry of activity. Enjoying a wonderful thanksgiving, preparing for Christmas, reading a barrage of nonsense e-mails about what should be a very simple white elephant gift exchange, etc.,....but of course most of this activity has revolved around Luke and his latest issues. Luke apparently likes to collect diagnoses like most people save baseball cards or those cute little collectible figurines that really just gather dust (at least at my house). The latest...a series of more specific diagnoses related to Luke's never ending OCD triggers and compulsions. It begins:
So a few months ago I notice Lukie is furiously itching his head. My first horrible nightmarish thought is he's gotten himself a case of lice....one of my BIGGEST fears in life (only second to cockroaches...yes I have a thing about bugs). So I begin to madly check his hair and see this horrible mess on his scalp that seems to have nothing to do with bugs. However, what I do notice is he seems to be pulling hair out as much as itching....NOT GOOD. A quick check with the therapist that night and we have a new diagnosis...trichotillomania. My reaction: "I'm sorry.....tricka-what?"
"Trichotillomania is hair loss from repeated urges to pull or twist the hair until it breaks off. Patients are unable to stop this behavior, even as their hair becomes thinner." http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0002485/
I'll spare you all the pretty pictures that go along with this diagnoses...but seriously...what in the f*ck? As if my kid doesn't have to deal with enough! But just wait...it gets better.
Just HOW does it get better? Because I have this brilliant idea, or so I think. Just shave his head and he won't be able to grasp the hair and it will stop! Right? The next morning I shave his head while mentally patting myself on the back. "Hell yes! I am awesome! I'm really starting to get this autism thing! I can do this on my own. I don't need his father's help. In fact, screw him! I am mother of the year!"
Ok...well....maybe I started with the mental bragging a little too soon, because within a week he just switched from pulling his hair out to picking his skin off. At this point, being the stellar intuitive mother that I am...I once again just assume the worst and think Lukie now has scabies. After a mad-midnight google image search I realize his rash looks NOTHING like scabies (thank the sweet baby Jesus) and make yet another appointment with the psychiatrist. Another day off work....unpaid. Another rushed trip to the doctor in the hopes that they will tell me its nothing and I'm just imagining the scabs all over his torso. Nope. But at least we walk out with yet another new compulsion...dermatillomania.
"Derma - skin
Till - pull
Mania - madness" http://www.skinpick.com/dermatillomania
Skin pulling madness sounds about right, except for I think the one going mad is ME! Now I feel like I gave my son another issue. What's better...pulling your hair out or your skin off? Watching your child hurt themselves in order to release anxiety is just OH SO FUN! And even better when the doc throws in "...oh and that jerking he does...I think that's Tourettes." Well of COURSE it is! So nonchalant...so casual. As if this is all just a big nothing....as if its the equivalent of saying "hey I think you're kid may end up left-handed."
I get these doctors are probably used to seeing these things day in and out, but as the parents I can assure them, it will never become NORMAL to hear these kinds of issues are residing inside your precious child. My new year's resolution is to write to every medical school in the country and demand they provide better instruction on bedside manner.....how do you think that will work out? (probably about as well as writing every congress person and news agency in my state to ask for support for better services for the mentally disabled).
Do I sound like I'm complaining? Yes? Probably because I am. But if I see another mommy blog about how hard it is to get an infant on a sleep schedule, or the trials and tribulations of cloth diapering I may just scream. Cloth diapering....how quaint. At least the year is winding down, we have an increase in meds to test out (for Luke, however I'm still waiting for mine haha), and I'm currently planning a nervous break down for me sometime just after the first of the year. I figure its the only way I'll get a vacation anytime soon!
Happy holidays!
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